A Tough Day
I downloaded the book A Beautiful Boy, as AddictionMyth suggested, I'm devouring the book as reading and getting educated on what I'm dealing with is one of my coping skills. My son was mad at me today. I allowed him a few minutes with his girlfriend on a three way call and then he wanted more, everyday, he said! Sounded agitated and angry because I said no, that wasn't a reasonable request and so he said, I'll talk to you tomorrow and I said okay! I wanted to call him back and talk with him, make him feel better, or better still make myself feel better. Instead, I decided to let him be as his request was not reasonable, and he needs to deal with that. I realize I need to let him grow up and deal with his frustrations and not rescue him but allow him the time and space to work it out, so I did!
So I continue on my own journey, the journey of acceptance that I don't have control over everything at his age. I can only frame a world that allows him to heal and deal with his choices, but his young mind needs to make different choices. So I need to have faith, that GOD will see him through, that my son can tap into his coping skills, and learn new ones that are not self destructive. I thank you for this forum where I can share my sadness, my hope, and my fears!